Depression and Toxic Relationships - 6 Signs Your Relationship May Be Causing Your Depression

Depression is common and may be caused by a multitude of factors. These can include unresolved past trauma, grief, current life stresses, and/or brain chemistry issues. One factor, however, that is often overlooked is the impact of toxic, emotionally and psychological abusive relationships on depression. Being subject to a hurtful partner day in and day out destroys confidence, self esteem, and joy. Here are 6 signs that your relationship may be causing your depression:

1. Your partner insults or puts you down, in public or in private. This may be blatant name calling, or it may be more subtle criticisms of what you do, who you are, and even your mental state or capacity.

2. Your partner attempts to control your daily activities. You may feel obligated to report all your doings to your partner, and feel as if you must defend or justify your choices. You may even get to the point of choosing activities specifically because you know that you will encounter less retribution from your partner.

3. Your partner tries to limit your access to work and to educational opportunities. This is a tactic that is designed to keep you dependent on your partner.

4. Your partner discourages or prohibits you from seeing friends and family. This may be a direct order not to go see someone, or it may be a more manipulative effort such as, "I can't believe you would choose to spend time with him/her/them over me." This strategy serves a couple of different purposes for the emotional abuser. It isolates you and affirms your partner's control over you, and it also reduces the opportunities for your loved ones to give you accurate and positive messages about you. You are also less likely to hear messages that criticize your partner.

5. Your partner implies non-physical threats for not complying with his or her demands. Once in awhile, your partner may commit a kind and generous act toward you, but this is not a sincere display of love, but a tactic designed to draw you back into the relationship. Once you are back under control, the emotional abuse begins again.

6. Your partner uses sex as a tool of control, manipulation, or domination. This may manifest as a demand for sex regardless of your wants and preferences, or it may be enacted in the opposite way, where sex is deliberately withheld from you in order to demoralize you and leave you feel vulnerable.